How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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