Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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