That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
