I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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