No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
