I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Someone shattered a urinal.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
