im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
