I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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