Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
