i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
