He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I still have a little drunk in my system
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
