You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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