I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
