Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
