I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
