i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
