STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
