Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
You ate ashes out of my bong
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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