She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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