from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
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