I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I just googled if crying burns calories
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
