I just made out with a guy for $7.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
