And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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