Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
