I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
