i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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