the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
bring money and cleavage
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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