He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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