god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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