I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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