So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize