Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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