it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
