Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize