It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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