Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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