That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
