Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I just googled if crying burns calories
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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