All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
