i need an iv and a liver transplant
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize