You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
