If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
