Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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