okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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