he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
