doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
your like the ambassador to my penis.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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