You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
