no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
