Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
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