Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
