i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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